Forever be my biggest supporter, even while he sleep

Here I am, 4.30 PM in my workplace, uploading this and that, checking here and there out of internet stuffs. Sitting on the chair behind me is my biggest supporter. waiting and sleeping. so tired of work, had to go everywhere, around the city today.

Just there, around me. and everything seems so complete. having you as my supporter feels like I already have the whole world. Thank you, A. I don’t know how to express it. but, I never doubt that I am one of the luckiest woman on earth. and I love you.


It is not possible to deal with all the things in our life. Good and bad things always around and we don’t have forever to deal it one by one everyday. so, If there are things that upset you, let you down, or when you are being issued by people around you. Let them deal with it. make your time to be positive, deal with things that give you strength, make you a better person. and let other be.

move forward and Let-It-Go is the key to everlasting happiness…… Yaaaayyyyy…..


Why is it So Hard to FALL IN LOVE

I am a teacher, you know that. a programming teacher. I can hardly become a professional programmer, because, one thing. I have a difficulties to ‘value’ my work. When I work on something, I’ll ask other people about that kind of ‘value’.. hahahaaaaa. Then I don’t think I can become one of that professional kinda person. Besides I am a woman who do something based on feelings. irrational, yes. But I can’t be somewhere I’m not comfortable. and it also goes on learning. I can’t learn something I don’t like to learn. But, Thank God I attracted to many things, and I have a curiosity trait on me. that’s my positive point. I love to learn. everything. anything.

I fall in love to science. I always wondering how gasoline can move that machine, how steam can transform to be electricity, how to extract electricity from water(not by taking the hydrogen), how to crochet, how people talk to each other in different languages, what is the ‘real’ history of human race, how the universe, how is other planet environment, is alien happen to exist?? questions of everything always buzzing inside  my head, and I got lots of difficulties to get rid of it. But again, love of science that force me to look for the answer. and Love also the only thing who make me learn Computer engineering instead of English literature. I love English, but I feel that me and computer is meant to be…hahahahhaaaa Continue reading

[story] Peeping up my back


Sometimes, I think, it was okay to peeping up on the box loaded by the memories I try to lock. And everytime I tried to look back, I found that I am so lucky that I’ve been trough worse and worst events and I am now alive and happy. I’ve got myself upside down just to hold onto my life and love, tried to hold it really hard and hurt myself lots of times. I was begged, I was crawl on the ground, I swallow my pride,nothing is left for me to brag about, thought that I could make it last forever, hope that he’ll finally realize that I am the only one who could love him that much. But then finally I found myself on the desert, being left and alone. found that I fought for nothing. And I was there, alone, in pain. But that was long time ago, before ‘A’ came back and save me. took me out from my worst and hold my hands helped me to stand. and everything has changed since then, my life comes back to it’s path.

It’s okay to look back, to see that God saved me from what I couldn’t handle, that He gave me an angel with his sharp eyes and gorgeous smile, an angel that save me lots lots of times. An angel named M. Arif Rahman.




A year has passed in a blink of eyes. it is a wonderful journey. On our first anniversary,our little A already 2 months old and the day will be just perfect with him around. For us, It’s not just a journey as a married couple, but more like a journey of a decade relationship that keep us together since my Brother introduced me to his close friend at 10 Juli 2005. How do I describe him ??? At the first sight, I thought he is a jerk. But, the weird thing was that I couldn’t put my icy face on him. I always have a hard time when it comes to strangers, I used to be cold and put myself in a distance and ignore their existence. But it doesn’t work on him. as a stranger we kept talk, and teased one another, and we managed to exchange jacket and beanie when we were at Mountain . hahahahhaaaa….. You know hate and attraction are as thin as air. Did I just admit my sin??? that I was attracted to him since the day we met?? oh…crap… yes.. I did. Happy now Mr. A. that I finally tell you that I was attracted to you, no… not before you show me your gentle, care towards me. not before you kept holding my hands even tough the roads no longer up hill. Continue reading

[story] R.I.P to what so called a Democratic Country

My first post after some period of time that feels like forever. its about politics. it’s not that I am one of the fans, it’s just there is something that tickling my belly lately. I am getting mad, upset, because of this whole drama they’ve played, and once again, even if I am not really into politic, I will tell you how sorry I am to see that the voices of Indonesian has been raped by our own ‘government’, or that’s how I used to call them.

It all began when their candidate for president seat was lose in the election and even after they took the proposal of re-election to the constitution, the proposal was rejected. when the rejection was announced back then, they swore to the public, they’ll make a move to show the upcoming President that their coalition got the power to  control the Parliament. and they mean that. after a while, their coalition propose to the parliament to stop the direct election of mayor in all of the city in Indonesia, and held a indirect-election instead. The citizen of Indonesia no longer needed in choosing their mayor. it will be done by the local government instead.

it’s obvious that most of the citizen reject it (I wonder if there is anyone who support this proposal) but they just like covering their eyes and ears and just go with all that they want to. What this country for them?? a playground for kids?? it’s an awfully childish act who whining because they lose the game. why can’t they just think about the positive side, being a gentlemen and work for the country instead of being busy kicking each other asses and put the whole country’s life in line just for their useless anger.

And since their proposal was approved by the parliament, we can do nothing but to speak up. the Indonesian should gather all together and tell them to change the decision. it’s time for them to hear the citizen’s ideas not just stuck on their own selfish ideas to protect their own seat and political party. they should remember that they meant to protect and represent the whole citizens of Indonesia, not only for their own party. They should keep that in mind.

So, let me state the final words. I’ll say Rest In Peace Indonesian Voices, Rest In Peace to what so called democratic country (that has been cost the souls of  students back then when they fought for democratic country) at the very end they died in vain. and before the put an end to this nonsense, and childish act we will [again] entering the dark ages of our fake democratic system. and transactional seat of mayor and corruption will be as easy as breathing the air…

[story] idling

Been idling for quite a while now. Days move so fast and I couldn’t keep up. I still amazed by all the things that happened lately. February and March were a combo Bless from God. Because I was Married on 28th of February. hahahaaaa…… such a wonderful moment and I can’t tell you how happy I was(am) to be the wife of that wonderful man who always around for the last decade-almost hehe. So, the thing is I’ve been missed all of the Post that I should make to mark the special event in my life, my wedding day is one of them, and my birthday. But, Honestly. Every things came in a row (wedding preparation, move in to a new-rent-house, office things and lots of projects) and still coming for the following month. Continue reading

[story] Family and Friends

Friendship marks a life even more deeply than love. Love risks degenerating into obsession, friendship is never anything but sharing. -Elie Wiesel

A friend is someone who knows all about you and still loves you. -Elbert Hubbard

The glory of friendship is not the outstretched hand, not the kindly smile, nor the joy of companionship; it is the spiritual inspiration that comes to one when you discover that someone else believes in you and is willing to trust you with a friendship. – Ralph Waldo Emerson

Best friend is like a family to me, they accept Continue reading

Welcome The new Resident

My room have a new resident. a cute little panda with red lips. it is a ‘He’ (I don’t care even he has a red lip). I was having a hard time deciding it’s gender. is it a male or female, but I decided, it’s a ‘He’. And his name is Bento. I did come up with the name of ‘gau’ (g like in good) like how Vietnamese call bears. But then, I think he resemble my friend, so….. a name happen.. hahahahhaaaa…. bentooo, sit down. bentoooo don’t step on my computer. bentooooo lay down. Bento, don’t goofing around 😀

My Friend will be happy…. hahhahahaaaa…. \(^_^)/

Continue reading

[crochet] Another colorfull Flowers and bag-will-be

This idea came from my students when they asked me to make this kind of flowers crochet. it’s not a new pattern tough, I just made this from the pattern I got from butterfly project, in this project, I skip the ‘fold’ phase and just let it be.

Crochet flowers

Crochet flowers

I did made some bows but forgot to take a picture of that. and the previous bag project that nearly done Continue reading